The selection of the casket is one of the first things grieving families think about when they are considering burial. Somehow this takes precedence because it is how most people believe they can preserve the memory of their loved one. Knowing that the deceased is safe in a secure casket provides a sense of final peace for them. Maybe this stems back to ancient traditions like the Egyptians who buried their pharaohs and noblemen in a sarcophagus inside a pyramid. Absolutely secure by their standards, it was also a preservation of who that person was in life.
Today, the type of casket people end up choosing is usually a blend of their spiritual beliefs and economics. If the deceased did not pre-select the casket, it is up to the survivors to make the right decision at this juncture. You have to draw out of them what their personal beliefs and priorities are before they can ever hope to make a decision that they will be satisfied with.
If you showcase your caskets first, the family will react by emotion rather than by reason. As much as being a funeral director is a business, a critical part of that business is meeting deep emotional needs. Isn’t that why you chose to become a funeral director in the first place? You have a sixth sense, a genuine connection with people who desperately wish their loved one hadn’t died, but now have to deal with it. You facilitate their grieving and help them heal by guiding them to make decisions that are right for them.
The best way to do this is to have a number of questions ready to ask them before ever allowing them to view casket styles. You need to get to the root of what they believe about a deceased’s body as it relates to the eternal. Do they believe that the only way to honor their loved one is with the absolute best in quality and workmanship? Do they believe that the body must be preserved in the ground or in a mausoleum forever? If so, then you can present the highest end options to them, explaining how these types of caskets will meet their expectations.
If they believe that the spirit of their loved one was released upon death into the spiritual realm, then they may opt not to make the quality of the casket paramount. They may still want an elaborate casket as a way to honor the deceased, so don’t assume anything. Keep probing until you are sure of what they want.
Economics is the second key factor in casket selection. Families that have the means may hold nothing back to give their loved one an elaborate, protective casket. Others may have the means, but, because they believe the spirit has already moved on, may select a more basic style for the funeral service, not worrying about long-term preservation of the body. Families on a tighter budget will want to find some kind of compromise between what they believe and what they can afford.
How you handle their questions and how you present their options will determine the outcome. It is always worth pushing a bit to see if the family will move up to the next level of casket quality and price. Often, when they are in a quandary of balancing their beliefs with the cost, they are willing to invest a little more if they feel that they are still being economically responsible. In the long run, this will provide additional comfort for them that they have done the most they could.
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